The Secret to Networking

I attended a workshop recently, something I like to do often to recharge my brain, and gained a lot of valuable tools and insight. Some of the most interesting learning though came from the conversations I had in the breaks with my fellow participants.

One key insight came through a conversation about the great networkers we've all met and watched in awe. You know the type, you attend an event with a friend and realize they know almost everyone in the room or you watch another friend have a conversation with a perfect stranger that has the quality of one between life long friends. As I chatted with the workshop leader about these phenomenal people he mentioned this gem, one of his great networking friends said it all came down to four words: Be interested not interesting.

Eureka! There is no better way to say it. I think we can all remember a time when we've walked away from a conversation at an event thinking "What a nice person" and realized you didn't really learn much about them but they learned tons about you. That is what the great networker does, they ask questions, paraphrase and generally make you feel like the most important person in the room. They are interested and that makes the person they are interested in feel great. Not only that but they now have great material to follow-up on with you and continue the relationship. Next time you are out there meeting new people give it at try!

Career vs. Job

Someone said to me recently that they wanted a career not a job. That got me thinking about what exactly the difference is between a career and a job. Some would say that a career is a series of jobs, others would say that a career involves actually having a titled profession.

The dictionary defines career as:

1.	an occupation or profession, esp. one requiring special training, followed as one's lifework.

2.	a person's progress or general course of action through life or through a phase of life, as in some profession or undertaking.

A job is defined as:
1. a piece of work, esp. a specific task done as part of the routine of one's occupation or for an agreed price.

2.	a post of employment; full-time or part-time position.

I know what this person meant was that what they were looking for was something that fulfilled them, that offered something more than just a pay cheque but also came with some status, a title and the opportunities for progression. A noble aspiration of course, but my fear is that we can get lost in the language and the expectations. Sometimes a job turns into a career when we least expect it. After all careers are made up of a number of jobs! Someone who claims to be looking for a career is likely unsure of what they want to do and would benefit from trying on a job or two to see if they fit.

From the definitions above jobs are the building blocks of a career. Overlooking that great job for the labeled career may mean passing up the first block that will ultimately build your career. So many success stories start with flipping burgers or sorting the mail. At face value these starting points are just 'jobs' but when viewed from the other end of a career they end up being catalysts for great careers.

Counting the little things

In an earlier post I mentioned the J.R.R. Tolkein quote "Little by little one goes far." Everyday we are taking small steps toward attaining our goals. Throughout this process it is key that we recognize the inches we move forward and not just the feet or miles. This is a point that Seth Godin made in The Dip as well. Being able to recognize even the small steps forward ensures you are not leaving an opportunity that is beneficial to you. Inches add up to feet and feet add up to miles.

Even if you are not working directly in the field that is your goal, you can focus on the transferable skills you are building in order to reach that goal in the end. Transferable skills are those things you use in any job, be it waiting tables or answering phones or running an accounting department. Skills such as communication, conflict management, organizing, decision making, creative thinking, etc... While you work towards your ideal career keep your mind open and aware to all the little things you do and learn. The number one issue I see with clients is that they sell themselves short and ignore all those things they have done that are not only tangible but transferable.

The Choice is Yours

I've been thinking a lot lately about choices. So many of us go through life letting others make our choices for us. Granted some of the aspects of our careers are in the hands of others but many aspects are based completely on the choices we make. When thinking about you're next career move, or even the place you are currently at, it is important to have a framework for making career choices. Some questions you should ask yourself in building your framework are:

Number one: What do I value in my life and in my job? Is it balance, achievement, monetary wealth, feeling as though I am making a positive contribution, flexibility, autonomy? Knowing the answer to this key question should inform the choices you make. If you value balance over money and are offered a job that pays more but requires you to work 20 hours more a week than you currently do will you be happy in that position?

Number two: How do I define success for myself? Our society has created a clear idea of success. Make lots of money, have a big house and drive a fancy car is the simple vision of success that is presented on TV. This vision of success often does not align with your personal values or reality. Consciously deciding what success looks like for you in the short and the long term will allow you to focus on achieving what is right for you.

Number three: What am I willing to sacrifice for career success? What am I not? These questions align closely with the first two. If you know what you value and what success looks like for you, you can then decide what sacrifices you are willing to make to achieve success. Perhaps balance is important to you but you are willing to sacrifice balance for now while you establish yourself. Or maybe money is paramount to you but you may be willing to take a step back in pay to have the opportunity to earn more longterm. The key is to make these sacrifices and choices consciously and with a plan in mind.

Book Review: The Dip by Seth Godin

The Dip: the little book that teaches you when to quit (and when to stick)
Synopsis: (from Amazon.com)
The old saying is wrong—winners do quit, and quitters do win. Every new project (or job, or hobby, or company) starts out exciting and fun. Then it gets harder and less fun, until it hits a low point—really hard, and not much fun at all. And then you find yourself asking if the goal is even worth the hassle. Maybe you’re in a Dip—a temporary setback that will get better if you keep pushing. But maybe it’s really a Cul-de-Sac, which will never get better, no matter how hard you try. According to bestselling author Seth Godin, what really sets superstars apart from everyone else is the ability to escape dead ends quickly, while staying focused and motivated when it really counts. Winners quit fast, quit often, and quit without guilt—until they commit to beating the right Dip for the right reasons. In fact, winners seek out the Dip. They realize that the bigger the barrier, the bigger the reward for getting past it. If you can become number one in your niche, you’ll get more than your fair share of profits, glory, and long-term security.
Losers, on the other hand, fall into two basic traps. Either they fail to stick out the Dip—they get to the moment of truth and then give up—or they never even find the right Dip to conquer.
Whether you’re a graphic designer, a sales rep, an athlete, or an aspiring CEO, this fun little book will help you figure out if you’re in a Dip that’s worthy of your time, effort, and talents. If you are, The Dip will inspire you to hang tough. If not, it will help you find the courage to quit—so you can be number one at something else.
Seth Godin doesn’t claim to have all the answers. But he will teach you how to ask the right questions.

Key ideas:

• Quitting is not the same as failing. This point is a great one and is the greatest virtue of this book. Their is no guilt or shame in quitting a job or project that is not a right fit for you and isn't leading to success or important learning. We make choices everyday that create our future. This is a great way of expressing the importance of trusting yourself in making a choice to turn in another direction that is right for you.
• Quitting out of fear or NOT quitting out of fear is not the right way to make a choice. Godin suggests having an 'exit strategy' before beginning. This is an exercise worth doing, even though your personal circumstances change you can always revisit but thinking through to the end allows you to understand what you want to get out of the experience you are embarking on and how to identify when it is no longer working for you.
• "If it scares you it might be a good thing to try" - pg 76
  

Take with a grain of salt:

• Godin really focuses on being the best in the world at whatever you do. I don't find this realistic. I found his style lacking a balance with choosing the lifestyle that is right for you. He doesn't seem to allow for definitions of success outside of the economic marketplace and uses the word 'loser' a little to easily.
  

Overall:
This book at 80 pages is a quick, interesting read that will help you think about your career in a more strategic way. That is always a good thing. Godin truly supports the concept that you are the CEO of You Inc. He asks some excellent questions to help you figure out where you are and where you should go next.